HOW TO KEEP YOUR MAN IN THE HOME AND MAKE HIM SPEND TIME WIHT YOU

I was watching a program recently on one of the local TV stations and the topic of discussion was ‘how to keep your man in the home and make him spend time with you?’ what I observed in the panel of discussants was that they were all females.  in my mind I was like, “how could this people be talking about making a man stay at home and they never deemed it fit to include a male in the panel of discussant to voice his own views on the matter?

This scenario is very rampant in the world today; where the opposite sex thinks that they can educate people on what the other sex want without consulting the other sex and hear their views on it. I have seen countless situations where women try to educate fellow women and men on what a man wants in a woman and likewise men educating fellow men and women of what a woman wants in a man.

Why can’t women just stick to their subject and tell us what they want from us (men) and vice versa. What I’m trying to point out here is that you can never know what your partner actually want or expect from you unless you ask him or her.
Instead of bothering yourself to read different people’s account on what is expected of women by men or vice versa, simply ask your spouse; because no two persons are the same or expect same things in this life even though it may be related in some cases.

When someone loves you then such person would always want to make out time to be with you. But when such a person is always giving an excuse for not wanting to spend some personal time with you, then something might be wrong and until that thing is corrected such person would see no reason why he/she should waste such time with you.

When such a person is your partner, then there should really be a cause for concern, because there’s no way a relationship can be healthy if both partners don’t spend quality time together. So as a woman, how can you make your man stay at home and spend some quality time with you?

Before I go on, I would like to state here that “if your man will not stay at home, he will not stay at home and there’s nothing you can do to make him stay; as he’ll always look for an excuse to justify his action of always going or looking outside”.

But to ensure that you’re not the one responsible for his actions and exonerate yourself from all his complaints and excuses, and also for those women that are unknowingly and unintentionally making their husbands keep leaving home and looking outsides, below are simple tips to help you put your home in order and make him want to stay home, spending quality time with you.

• Keep your home neat and refreshed always:

Like the saying goes, ‘cleanliness is next to godliness.’ When the home is clean at all times, it makes the home looks comfortable and welcoming. A clean environment creates a kind of peaceful feelings in the mind of an individual. Why do you think most people leave their homes to go and spend some of their weekends in hotels?  Because of the neatness of the environment.

Always strive to keep your home looking clean and comfortable as that may just be what might be making your hubby leave home unnecessarily. Don’t make him use the untidiness of your home as an excuse for his refusal to stick around and spend some quality time with you.

• Make your home peaceful:

No man ever looks forward to going back to or spending time in a place where he’s constantly being criticized. One of the most common excuses men give for not staying at home is that they don’t have rest of mind whenever they are at home as a result of the incessant complaints and nagging of their wives.

 How do you make your home peaceful?  Limit your nagging and the level of faults you find in him and you’ll be glad you did. Instead of always stating what he has not done or is refusing to do in a way that he might consider as nagging, learn to engage him in a reasonable discussion and state your case when he’s settled down. That way you’ll reduce the likelihood of negative reaction from him and he’ll respect you for your matured and tactical approach to your family issues.

Do not turn your home into a debating ground as that is exactly what nagging does. It makes your husband want to counter your claims and view them as unreasonable – even if your claims are right, the manner of approach is greatly important as that determines if your hubby is going to reason with you or run from you.

Make your home a peaceful haven for him and he would always look forward to spending quality time with his loving and welcoming wife.

• Know how to cook his favorite meals:

The saying that ‘the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach’, can’t be over emphasized. When you are good at cooking as a woman, you’ve gotten fifty percent of your husband’s heart. When most men start misbehaving in their homes, one of the first things they do is that they stop eating their wives’ food.

 Take note and observe this and you’ll see the reality in it. Make your husband look forward to coming back home to devour your sumptuous meal. Women that are good at cooking create this mindset in their men that no one can do it better than her, hence the husband would not want to do anything funny that would make her stop giving him such sumptuous meals. Remember that you could possess 50% of your hubby’s heart just by being good in this area.

• Keep yourself looking neat and attractive:

The saying “you’re addressed the way you dress is also applicable in marriage”. When the only time your husband sees you looking good and wears something nice and attractive is when you are going out to your place of work or a function, then something is likely to go wrong with your marriage in no distant time.

 There’s this practice I find so annoying that most ladies indulge in – they dress very shabbily at home when they have no place to go and leave their hair very unkempt and only change into something attractive when they are about to go out. There are some others that don’t even know how to dress attractively.

No wonder you have your hubby leaving home at every little chance he has because you’re not giving him any reason to want to make him stay in the house with you. Besides, he sees a lot of neat looking and attractive ladies outside and he wonders why he should limit himself to just gazing at an unkempt and shabbily dressed lady in his house just because he’s married when he could have a wonderful view of neatly dressed and attractive ladies outside.

Ladies, it’s not a crime to look beautiful and attractive when you are home with your hubby as it increases his level of attraction toward you. Don’t make it that the only time you look good is when you’re going out, look good when at home and in the company of your husband. Besides, if you don’t look good for your hubby, who are you suppose to look good for?

Give your hubby reasons to want to come home and spend time with his beautiful and sexy wife. Don’t make yourself look like an old, unkempt elderly woman before you eventually get to that stage. You can actually make your hubby look forward to coming home and spending time with his sweet heart because there’ll be some pleasant sites for his eyes to see – you.

• Dress for your husband:

There’s a difference between dressing for yourself and dressing for your husband. Most times women dress so as to get the admiration of other women and satisfy their own lust. This doesn’t have to be the case in all situations, mostly if you have the intention of increasing the level of attraction between you and your husband.

 Dressing for your husband is wearing those things he loves to see you in and that tickle his fancy. Wear those hot and sexy clothes when in the home, make him want to grab you and unable to take his eyes off you.

Remember that he is your husband and there’s no shame or harm in making him burn with desire for you. You alone can stir that in him. But remember that if you fail to do that or see it as unnecessary, someone else might be very willing to help you do that outside and the repercussion is usually not very pleasant. Be the one to stir that fire in him and make him always want to come home because there’ll be a lovely sight to behold – you.

• Be his buddy:

Have you asked yourself why he always leaves home? It may not be because he doesn’t love you or that finds you repulsive, maybe he just can’t fathom what he would sit at home doing with you. Maybe he thinks he’s going to die of boredom should he try that. So why not make yourself his buddy. How? Have you ever bothered to ask yourself what guys do when they go out or keep each other company?

Learn how to play with your partner. When I was in college there was this lady that visits me often and she do come along with that game called ‘scrabble’. You would not believe that I and that lady would spend the whole day playing that scrabble and it usually was very fun: we would laugh, tell stories, eat together etc.

you can try that with your partner. Know the kind of games he enjoys playing and put it in the home. Learn to discuss fun stuffs that are devoid of family issues, you could also look for some of his favorite movies and watch it with him. What kind of man wouldn’t be happy to do what he enjoys doing with the one he loves – you.

 Make yourself his buddy and make him see reasons for wanting to spend time with you and you’ll be amazed at how he would always look forward to both of you spending some time together.

• Know how to stroke his ego:

Most women, the only time they speak well of their hubby in his presence is when they want something from him. Ma, just like you feel on top of the world when the one you’re sharing your life with gives you sincere compliments and praises, same applies to your hubby.

Speak good words to your hubby; tell him how you can’t live without him. Compliment him, thank him for his support, shower praises on him and see how your hubby is going to always make sure that he does things that doesn’t make you change your views about him. When you speak well about your hubby in his presence, it enhances his ego and makes him feel on top of the world like you would do when he showers you with sincere compliments.

The problem with most women is that, the only words the husband hear from them are words of complaints about what and what he’s failed to do, how useless he has become, how his friends and mate are doing so and so, etc.

You take your husband’s mind and thoughts away from you when you always bring his ego down. Learn to stroke you hubby’s ego by telling him sweet words and see how is behavior will greatly change toward you for the better.

• Don’t be scared to try out new stuffs with him in your inner chamber:

I wouldn’t want to talk about this, but since you don’t want to give your man any room for an excuse, learn to participate when you and your hubby are involved in the bedroom business: don’t just lie down there and make him do everything. Be open to try new stuffs with him and let him know that you also have his pleasuring at heart. Teach him how to handle you and also learn how to handle him in ways that beats his imagination.

Relationship is like a site with no structure on it that requires both parties involved to put their heads together to create what they desire. And one way of doing this is by spending some quality time together.

Yes, sometimes your partner might really want to spend some time with the guys or feel like taking a stroll to where ever he pleases, that should not be a problem as long as he also creates time for being with you. But if he’s always going out and never willing to spend any reasonable time with you as his partner, then I think it’s time you take a stand on your relationship and let him know what his action depicts and how such actions makes you feel.

Understand that if a man really wants to work on his relationship and bring the best out of it, he knows what to do to transform his relationship into whatever he desires. Note that if a man is going to wander, irrespective of what you do: whether good or bad, he’ll still find an excuse to do that. So just do your best and take the blame from off your head.