WHAT IS LOVE TO YOU?

I heard a guy talking about love with another guy and I asked him this simple question ‘what is love to you?’ here’s the response he gave, ‘love is the best thing and the worst thing that can happen to anyone.’ I asked him again, ‘what makes love the worst thing that could happen to anyone?’

And his response goes thus,
‘people are not sincere about themselves and are willing to hide their true selves until they have hooked whoever they are interested in building a relationship with.’ my next question to him was, ‘do people insincerity make love worst or imperfect?’ here’s his response, ‘you don’t know anything, you can’t use head knowledge of love to judge reality.’

This is where most of the misconception about relationship stems from. So many people profess love for someone, but couldn’t really tell what the word ‘love’ is to them. A guy that claimed to have undying love for a certain lady was asked how he knew he loves her and he said ‘I just felt it in my heart so deep, I just can’t explain it.’ He was also asked ‘what he loves about her?’ And he said ‘everything.’

To that guy, love is just a deep tingle or feelings in his heart for someone that he has interest in. My question to people like him is, ‘what happens after the deep feelings had subsided?’ Because it will certainly subside. When you define love as just a mere feeling, then it becomes easier to develop a different feeling for someone else when that person you first developed feelings for isn’t doing what you wanted. Love is much more than just a feeling.

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Just like the guy above said, ‘love is the best thing that can actually happen to anyone.’ That is very true. But what makes love the best thing that can ever happen to anyone? Because it has to do with accepting that individual for whom he/she is. You have to accept their good and their bad. This is where most people usually give up in their love journey. They forget that the supposed object of their love is also a human with flaws. For you to say you love him/her, you have to fully prepare your mind to accept their flaws also. Accepting people’s flaws is never an easy thing to do but it can be done in an environment of love. You don’t love someone, if you can’t accept his/her flaws also.

So, what is love to me? I define love as accepting someone for who he/she is and investing your best in them to make them better. You make them better, not change them into what you want them to be. When you tell someone ‘I love you,’ what are you saying to the person? You’re simply telling him/her that you accept everything about them. This is why it’s very important that you know someone before you throw your love at him or her because the moment you profess your love for that person, you’re supposed to be bound by your profession.

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I will say here that ‘love is perfect and does not hurt anyone.’ Your love for someone would want to make you do things for them that you wouldn’t normally do (sacrifice). Someone might ask, ‘why do people in loving relationship most times come out hurt and broken?’ Good question. They were not hurt because love hurt them. They were hurt because their partner took advantage of their love for them to hurt them. In other words, they were hurt because of the selfishness of their partners. That is why it is very important you know a bit about the person you’re throwing you love at.

Love doesn’t hurt anyone and love has never been known to hurt anyone. All my previous relationships that ended were as a result of selfishness from my part or from the part of my girl friends. Love is perfect, I must say it again. It is not a two edged sword waiting to slice your throat when you’re not watching. Understand that the way you define love would determine how well you would relate with the object of your love.

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Don’t put yourself in a box like most people out there that claim to know a lot about love but can’t really tell what love really means to them; even with their supposed numerous experiences. What you can’t define, you can’t relate with fully. Also what you define wrongly, you relate with wrongly. Love doesn’t hurt and love is perfect. Love isn’t a two edged sword, love is a life giver. When you love someone, don’t hold anything back, because it is very much better to love and fail than not to love at all.