I have heard so many definitions of
real men and strong women, but I don’t think some of those definitions really depict
who a real man or a strong woman really is.
I asked one of my female friends
that is doing very well for herself ‘who she thinks a strong woman is?’ this is
the answer she gave me. She said, ‘a strong woman is a woman who makes her own
money and doesn’t depend on a man for anything’.I was shocked at the last part of her definition that says ‘doesn’t depend on a man for anything’. So I asked her, even in marriage? She said yes, that a strong woman will have to tell her man that she can take care of herself and do anything that makes her happy, whether he is there or not. Really! I said.
Still in shock, I asked her, what is
your own definition of a real man? She said, ‘a real man is a man that has his
own money and he knows how to treat a woman right’. this time I got angry and I
asked her, so you mean for a woman to be strong she has to make her own money
and know how to make herself happy, while for a man to be real, he has to make
his own money and know how to spend it on a woman, right? She confidently said
yes.
I asked her sarcastically this time; ‘don’t
you think women are being biased and greedy by expecting men to spend on them
while they will not be willing to do the same?’ She quickly cut me short by
saying, ‘ that’s how the world is, men that will expect any woman to spend her
hard earned money that is supposed to be for her happiness on them are weak men’. I just
could not ask her any more questions because I discovered that the image she has
created about her own real men and strong women is a biased one.
To her, if the man is not pleasing
the woman, he is not a real man. But the woman does not have to please the man,
she only has to make her own money and put the man down in order for her to be
considered as a strong woman. This is exactly what many women actually think a
strong woman is. They think a strong woman is a woman that can stand up to a
man and tell him that ‘I don’t need your money or whatever you think you have, I
have my own money and I can take care of myself’. This is one of the major
reasons why relationships don’t last anymore because both men and women are beginning
to think that they don’t need each other anymore.
This is what prompted me to sit down
and begin to ponder on who I think a real man or a strong woman is to me. Here are
my definitions of who I think a real man or a strong woman is:
WHO IS A REAL MAN?
- A real man is a man that knows who he is, what he is and why he is what he is.
- A real man is a man that respects himself, his marriage, his wife and his family.
- A real man is a man that knows his responsibilities to his wife, his family and his society.
- A real man is a man that does not look for the slightest opportunity to abuse his wife and children. He understands that she is prone to make mistakes because she is also human and he corrects her with love and care.
- A real man is a man that will never do or engage in acts that will endanger his life, his wife and his family.
- A real man is a man that will doggedly defend his wife and family from any negative external influence.
- A real man is a man that is not scared to support his wife to achieve her dreams because he knows she will use it to build their home.
- A real man is a man that willingly shares ideas with his wife and make her know his plans and intentions because he wants to build a better home.
- A real man is a man that is not disturbed by the success of his wife because he understands that it is also for his own good and the good of his family.
- A real man is a man that loves himself, his wife and his family.
- A real man is a man that always puts in effort to enhance his relationship with his wife and his family.
- A real man is a man that doesn’t walk out on his wife and children when they needed him the most.
- A real man is a man that understands that every decision he takes whether good or bad will also affect the ones that cares about him. Etc.
Real men are not identified by their
appearances, social status, wealth or fame, they are known by their ACTIONS.
If I should ask you reading this, ‘can
you confidently say you are a real man?’
Also Read: My Thought on True Feminism
Also Read: My Thought on True Feminism
WHO IS A STRONG WOMAN?
- A strong woman is a woman that knows who she is, what she is and why she is what she is.
- A strong woman is a woman that knows what she wants to become in life and she isn't scared to pursue her dream.
- A strong woman is a woman that understands her roles in the society and doesn't shy away from them.
- A strong woman knows her worth and values and she carries herself with respect
- A strong woman is a woman that respects herself, her marriage, her husband and her family.
- A strong woman is a woman that understands her responsibilities to her husband, her family and the society.
- A strong woman is a woman that will never engage in acts that will endanger her life, her husband and her family.
- A strong woman is a woman that doesn’t look down on her marriage and husband because she earns more than him.
- A strong woman is a woman that doesn’t use her wealth to control her husband because she thinks she contributes more to the home than him.
- A strong woman is a woman that understands that her husband is the head of the family and does all she can to support him to make the family stand.
- A strong woman is a woman that doesn’t walk out on her marriage, her husband and her family in the event of difficulties or challenges.
- A strong woman is a woman that takes her decision with care because she understands that every decision she takes will either directly or indirectly affect her marriage, her husband and her family.
- A strong woman is a woman that doesn’t talk down on her husband at the slightest opportunity
- A strong woman is woman that defends her husband and family from any negative external influence. Etc
Strong women are not identified by
their appearance, social status, wealth or fame; they are identified by their ACTIONS.
Just because you earn more than a
man doesn’t make you a strong woman; also, just because you claim to be
independent, doesn’t still make you a strong woman. The fact that you talk down
on men, trample down men or try to put men where you think they belong doesn’t
also make you a strong woman. Strong women respect and value themselves, others, their marriage, their men and their family.
Do you think you have what it takes
to be regarded as a strong woman?
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