7 DISRESPECTFUL WAYS OF APPROACHING A LADY FOR A RELATIONSHIP

I was walking along a lonely path one Saturday’s evening and there was this neatly dressed handsome young man in front of me walking in the same direction with me and coming toward us in the opposite direction was a very pretty and shapy young lady.

The moment the lady got to where this young man was, he quickly grabbed her by the hand. Since I was at a distance from him I could see all that was going on clearly, though I thought that she was someone he knew judging from the way he grabbed her hand. But the next words I heard were, ‘how could you grab me like that?’ ‘Do I know you?’

These were coming from no other person than the lady. She was reacting at the way the guy grabbed her by the hand. The guy quickly helped himself by apologizing and before he started introducing himself to the lady properly but the lady wasn’t interested any more, she was just muttering some incoherent words I couldn’t fathom and walked away. The guy was so embarrassed at the way the lady walked out on him and the next thing he did was to start calling her rude and mannerless.

Where I were, I couldn’t help but wonder how someone could grab somebody he never knew before in such a manner and expect her to give him a favorable response. Come to think of it, the guy really had a good chance of winning the lady over should he had taken another means of approach but it was too late for him to make amends because his manner of approach had already sold him off as being disrespectful.

The way you approach a lady determines the kind of response you’re likely to receive in return. Though there are still some ladies that irrespective of your manner of approach might still sound nice and cool but it’s better to be on the safer side by doing what’s right than for you to get yourself insulted and embarrassed when you least expected.

Below are 7 manners of approach you should avoid when trying to get the attention of a lady because majority of ladies may find such manners of approach offensive and disrespectful.

Grabbing her:

You see a guy approaching a lady he never knew before for the first time and the first thing he does is to grab her by the hand. For heaven’s sake, how could you approach a person you don’t know from Adam and have never met before in such a manner? This is not only disrespectful but could also be described as an assault on her.

The only set of ladies that might see nothing wrong in such a manner of approach are those that we classify as ‘hookers’. Approaching a lady in such a manner is an indirect way of telling her that you consider her as a hooker and doesn’t intend in building anything serious with her.

No wonder you see most of them putting up some form of violent display when someone approached them in such a manner. Though, there may be some ladies that wouldn’t see anything wrong in your manner of approach but it’s better you approach her in a responsible way and avert any form of embarrassment on yourself.

Handing over your phone to her without her asking for it:

I was in a public transport on a certain Friday evening going back home from work and there was this pretty lady that was seated between me and one other young man. The bus had hardly moved a reasonable distance when I saw this young man handed over his mobile phone to the lady and didn’t say anything thereafter.

 The lady thought he wanted to ask for help with something on the phone and she held it looking at this guy. I was shocked when I heard the guy say, ‘you know what to do na!’ The lady quickly threw his phone back on his body with a very loud ‘hiss’ that got everyone in the bus startled. The guy was so embarrassed and he couldn’t utter a word until he got to where he alighted from the bus.

Man, just handing over your phone to a lady and asking her to input her digit when she has never met you before is a sure way of setting yourself up for some embarrassing display. The fact that it might have worked for some other guys doesn’t make it right and should not be practiced at all because it’s one sure way of telling a lady indirectly that she’s got no option than to do your biddings. So I would advice that you don’t practice such because you might just be giving someone a free opportunity to run you down.

 Trying to get her attention by making hissing and whistling sounds:

Sincerely speaking I was also guilty of this very practice when I was much younger until a particular lady that I was trying to get her attention by making such hissing(sssss..) sound, walked up to me and screamed in my face, ‘I am not an animal please!’ turned around and walked away.

It was on a broad day light and I was so embarrassed that I didn’t take that path for a whole month.
I never knew that lady was going to react that way to me because it was one of the most common ways of getting a lady’s attention then. Though, I put a stop to such a practice from that day onward.

 Some ladies view such a practice as a degrading manner of getting their attention and would never look at those trying to get their attention in such a manner even if such a person would have stood a chance of winning them over initially.

Though I learnt my lessons the hard way but I got to understand that some ladies still have class and wouldn’t respond to you in a friendly manner unless you approached them in a civil and responsible manner. Don’t make yourself regret not having someone that should have been an easy catch as a result of your wrong means of approach.

Professing your love for her on the first meeting:

How could you profess love for someone you don’t know and are just meeting for the first time? Most guys thought that professing their love for a lady that they’re just meeting for the first time is a sure way of getting a pleasant response from her. But this is actually what may be going through the lady’s mind; ‘is this guy sane? Or is he high on something? How could he tell me he loves me when he doesn’t even know me?’

 Guys, complimenting the beauty of a lady is understandable and acceptable not the professing of an undying love when you don’t even have a clue of what her name is. Doing such is one sure way of telling her that you’re an immature fellow that still has some serious growing up to do.

Staring at other parts of her body order than her face:

 

Some guys are fond of doing this; mostly if the lady in question is heavily endowed in the chest region. They either consciously or unconsciously start staring at her chest region the moment the lady stops to give them her attention. Such a practice creates a doubt in the lady’s mind if you’re really interested in her or her physical asset.

Some guys would make the staring so obvious in a way that the lady would start feeling very uncomfortable. By doing such you’re simply telling the lady that you’re only interested in her body and nothing more. Even if your intentions were right, your action has already betrayed any good intention you might have had toward her.  Such a practice should be avoided completely unless you’re prepared to receive whatever might be coming your way as a result of your manner of approach.

Pretending to know her by calling her the name of someone else:

When I was in the university, there was this particular day I was walking a female friend of mine to the hostel after lectures and we kept hearing somebody shouting ‘Jane’ behind us continuously. None of us responded since none of our names were Jane.

She was shocked when the guy rushed to where she was, held her by the hand and said, ‘Jane are you not the one that I’ve been calling ever since? Why are you pretending like you didn’t hear me?’ she was so angry that she had to slap the guy’s hand from hers and shouted at him that she didn’t know him.

I thought he was going to turn around and started going his way, the next word he said and the response she gave him actually got me laughing. He said something thus after her first outburst, ‘ha, take it easy na, is it a crime for someone to find you attractive again?’ he was yet to finish his statement when she replied, ‘by giving me a by force name en? I beg get lost jare!’

I felt so sorry for the guy at the way the lady turned him down in such a degrading and embarrassing manner but he would have avoided such if he had chosen a different route of approach.

 Displaying an unnecessary familiarity with someone you’ve never met before when you have the intent of wooing her is a quick route for an unexpected embarrassment. Be calculative and respectful in your manner of approach and you’ll be amazed at how easily you’ll get the ladies giving you a favorable response with just a little effort.

Trying to entice her with your possession:

You might have had a lot of successes doing such with ladies that sees a man’s possession as the most vital ingredient for securing their approval and with no much self worth, but should you mistakenly attempt such with ladies that have a high sense of value and self worth, you’ll be setting yourself up for a possible embarrassment.

I see guys and men that put their possessions and wealth forward in order to win a ladies love or get their attention as men suffering from low self esteem. It’s even more pathetic when what the man rants about his not even his but his father’s, brother’s or his friend’s.

You don’t need to flaunt what you have in order to secure a lady’s love. Doing such is another indirect way of telling her that she’s cheap and could be bought with whatever you have.

 Ladies that fall for such men are the types that see relationship as a poverty alleviation scheme and assess a man’s worth based on what he has acquired. How are you even sure that such ladies are really going to love you for you and not what you’ve got to offer them?

The manner in which you approach a lady for a relationship goes a long way to determining the kind of response you’ll be receiving from her end. Your way of approach speaks a lot about your person and your thought pattern.

If you certainly want to prevent yourself from some unnecessary embarrassment I would admonish you don’t practice the above else you should be prepared for whatever might come your way should you decide to take such a path.