As someone seeking
for a loving and lasting relationship, it is pertinent you know why your
partner is with you as this could give you a clue of the life span of such a
relationship. The dynamics of your relationship since inception tells a lot about
its life span. One problem with most of us in romantic relationships is that we
fail to observe how our relationship has been playing out since it started. The
reasons that brought you and your partner together tells a lot about the life
span of your relationship.
We know that not all relationships are marriage
bound, but you can actually have an idea of what to expect if you have a clue of
why your partner is in the relationship with you.
People go into
relationships for various reasons and a person’s reason for going into a
relationship will determine to a great extent how they are going to treat that
relationship. Even if they fail to tell you their reasons for being in
the relationship with you, you can decipher why they are with you by simply
observing their pattern of communication and actions whenever they are with you.
Don’t be among
those that are easily carried away by sweet talks and nice actions. What you
should be asking yourself is, ‘how long will such sweet talks and nice actions
last?’ you need to understand the
difference between ‘being nice’ and ‘acting nice’. People act nice when they want to get
something from you that you would normally not give to them: thus they put up
that act of niceness in order to make you lose your guard and see them as real
and sincere.
They let you see
them for who they really are after they might have gotten what they want from
you to their satisfaction. Just that by this time it is already too late because
they have already drained whatever it is that got them to you. This piece is
written to highlight some of the modus operandi of this category of people and
if you can be observant enough, you will be able to unmask most of them and see
them for who they really are before it will be too late.
Below are some common
characters displayed by those that get into relationship with you based on
their own personal gain;
- They act extremely nice:
If the action he or
she is portraying is too nice to be real, then you should watch it because you
might only end up setting yourself up for some heart aches later. I’m not
saying that it’s wrong to be nice or that there are not some sincerely nice
people. But when someone is always acting nice and fails to react to things
that any sane human being would normally react to, then you should really be
careful.
People that are in a
relationship solely for their personal gain wouldn’t want to do anything to
create any doubt in you until they are sure that they have gotten what they
want from you.
- They tend to give you no time to think your decision through:
Such people hardly
give you time to think your discussion through. They want you to start acting
immediately on them without having any second thoughts. To them, the more you
spend time thinking about it, the more you’re likely to see what they are up to
– hence the rush.
When he/she is
always rushing you to make up your mind faster over something that is going to
be of benefit to him/her, then you should watch it because he/she might just be
in that relationship with you for his/her personal gain.
- They use deceptive words on you to make you do things for them (they are manipulative):
Such category of
people always uses manipulative words and actions to get what they want from
you. some of their common lines are, ‘if you love me, then you would do…….’ ‘Prove
to me that you love me,’ ‘you don’t love me enough that is why you …..,’ etc.
Watch these set of people carefully because they always use deceptive love
quote to make you do things that’s going to be to their benefits. They are very
manipulative because they tend to make you feel guilty for not doing what they
ask of you.
Should you be in a
relationship with such type of a person, you should really prepare your mind
for the worst because he/she might not likely be in the relationship for you
but for something that he/she has to gain from you.
- They place unnecessary demands on you:
They don’t care about your situation, to them
love is all about giving them what they want. They demand things from you like
you owe them. One funny thing about these sets of people is that they sometimes
demand things that they know is not within your reach and they will be asking
you to prove your love for them by getting them what they want.
You should understand
that such category of people don’t have your interest at heart and should never
be taken seriously. Some may even go to
the extent of threatening to break up with you if you don’t give them what they
want. This is a clear indication that he/she is in that relationship with
you for personal gain and the moment you observe such in your partner, it’s is
either you call him/her to order or you quit the relationship before they will
push you to go and do something that you’ll regret all through your life.
- They act mad when you deny them their demand:
This is one sure
way you can truly know someone that is in the relationship with you because of
their personal gain. They always act offended and mad when you deny them their demand.
No matter how genuine your reason might be for turning down their demand, they
view it as an assault and act very mad toward you to an extent that you might
eventually start feeling guilty for turning them down.
Such type of people don’t care about your
interest and your feelings, all they care about is what they want and how they
can get you to give them what they want. They don’t care about the situation or
challenge you might be facing at the time of their demand, all they care about
is having what they want from you with no excuse coming from your end – they don’t
always care how you get the demand done, so far you get it for them. This is a
clear sign that he/she does not care about you but their needs, and your
emotions should never be invested on such set of people because they would
leave you drained and frustrated.
- They always view things from their point of view:
Their views are
always right. If it doesn’t conform to what he/she thinks, it’s wrong and not
acceptable. Whatever they discuss with you, there must be something that he/she
must gain from it else they won’t give you their audience. To them any
discussion brought to the table must first answer what’s in for them before
they can give it their attention.
Whatever they say
is final and should be taken as right with no questioning. Even when they call
for a discussion, they don’t want to hear your input. To them your input is not
needed, they just want you to listen and accept what they have to say with no
objection. These sets for people should be avoided like a plague because all
they care about is themselves. They fail to understand that no relationship can
ever strive in an environment where there is no freedom of reasoning and
opinions.
With the way your
partner behaves and act around you, you can have a clue of their intentions
for being with you. Don’t waste your time and energy on someone that only sees
you as a means to an end – whether male or female, because you might just end
up setting yourself up for some serious heart ache when such a person is done
sucking all what he/she desires from you.
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